Shame to Grace

by Pastor Steph

Last week, I was reading a devotion that my friend and colleague Rollie Johnson wrote. He talked about his sewing skills and how he handcrafted a pair of snow pants for his winter camping trip. His skill with a needle and thread made me a little jealous.

I am the girl who failed home economics in high school. To the disappointment of my mother, I still cannot even sew a button on. In my freshman year, I was sent to the principal’s office twice. Both visits were home economic related. You see, we had to sew a pair of pajamas using an assigned pattern. I did not like the pattern I was assigned and so argued with the teacher. Trip one to the office. Trip number two to visit with the principal happened when I was sick and tired of pricking my finger threading the needle on the machine. I said a "choice" word under my breath and the teacher heard it. I guess she was still upset with me for arguing, so back I went to the principal’s office.

The pajamas turned out horribly. I sewed one leg shut so many times that the material ripped at the seam. The arms of the pajamas were two different lengths. The garment was unrecognizable as an article of clothing. Rags to wash the floor with was more like it. But you know what? I hung onto those pajamas for years. I took them home and tucked them in my dresser drawer. Shame. Every time I looked at those pajamas, I felt ashamed. They were a constant reminder of my failure and I hung onto them to reinforce the inner voice that told me so.

Author and speaker Brene Brown says, “shame is the warm feeling that washes over us, making us feel small, flawed and never good enough.” I had to physically remove the pajamas from my drawer to start the shame removal process and move toward grace. “Grace,” Brown says “means that all our mistakes serve a purpose instead of serving shame.” The purpose of those pajamas lies in this reminder to you: You are enough. You are more than enough. Not because of your skills, talents, or abilities but because of Jesus, you are worthy, loved, honored, cherished, and forgiven.

In John’s gospel, Jesus says, “Everyone who commits sin is a slave to sin. The slave does not have a permanent place in the household; the son has a place there forever. So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.” (John 8: 34-35)

In other words, we are all held captive by something we have stuck in our drawer. Shame, guilt, anger, ego, arrogance, pride. Take your pick. We cling to it; hold onto it longer than we need to because it is what we know. What if we knew Jesus and found our freedom to move forward in his grace? This is what it means to be free, indeed. To give Him, who stitched us together in our mother’s womb, our rags and watch as He turns them to riches.

-- Pastor Steph

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