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The first year our family was in Nebraska we knew we would be alone for the holidays. We knew it. We planned for it. And still when the day of turkey and stuffing came to town, we felt an emptiness. All the people we loved weren’t with us at the table. I tried to make it festive by overcompensating with more. More decorating. More dessert. More gratitude games around the table, but even with more we couldn’t shake the loneliness we felt.
This year we are back home in North Dakota and the irony is, we will likely be alone again for the holidays. Like many of you in these COVID crazy days, choosing to gather or not gather isn’t an easy decision and often it’s not a decision at all. Loved ones have died and their absence at the table is heart wrenching. There isn’t enough “more” you can do to patch the pain of an empty chair they won’t ever sit in again.
Loneliness is a silent killer. It robs us of resting in the joy of our Lord. Jesus said, “the thief comes only to steal, kill and destroy. I came that you may have life and have it abundantly.” Jesus came to bring us life– life lived fully without the constant pulse of emptiness and yet, this time of year especially, I can’t quite shake that nagging feeling of being alone.
The truth is, even with a house full of people we can still feel alone. All the “more” in the world won’t take away loneliness lodged deep in our heart. Confess it. Pray, “Jesus I need you. Lord I need you. Every hour I need you. You are my one defense. You are my righteousness. Oh God how I need you.” The struggle of loneliness is real, but the power of God is greater. It is when I forget to fully rely on the power of God, that I feel the most empty. How about you? Rather than more grief, more beating yourself up, more Amazon purchases, or more dessert, will you lean into the holidays fully relying on God, trusting that the joy of the Lord can be your strength?
Please, if loneliness has crept in and choked out all your joy, please, please reach out. The thief that Jesus speaks of wants us to believe that we are alone, but we are not. For while there may be a seat empty at your kitchen table, there is a chair in Heaven seated at the right hand of God that is indeed interceding for you and for me. Jesus loves you and so do we, the community of faith and so while we are apart, I know Christ Jesus still lives in our heart. May it be so and may we live abundantly with less of the more, and more of God.
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